How To Make Amends With Family

We understand that fact and don’t choose to run from it, and we understand that words cannot make those painful memories disappear. We can only become who we intend to be, and acknowledge to others that those addictive behaviors have no place in our lives from here on out. In early recovery, parents might feel pressured to make up for lost time and experiences. We’ve had a spiritual awakening, and we suddenly want to fit as much as possible into each day—and we want to quickly repair all the harm we caused during active addiction. I don’t call him to see how his meeting went this week or what step he’s on.

Sitting Down and Doing Step 8

Facing the fact that omissions can be painful made this a powerfully healing step to do. And I keep on working it by staying sober, that is also living amends a form of an amend. Join our supportive sober community where each day becomes a step towards personal growth and lasting positive change.

How Will Making Amends Help My Recovery?

Step eight is preparation for the action of step nine, which involves putting your recovery into action. Far from being a one-off activity, making amends should be a consistent commitment throughout the recovery process from a drug or drinking problem. Demonstrating changed behavior and abstaining from repeating past mistakes are part of this commitment. Next, your amends script should also encompass the expression of heartfelt regret. This involves showing that one’s actions now align with their intentions, as opposed to the misalignment or downright manipulations that often occur during active addiction. To express regret genuinely includes acknowledging the emotional impact of one’s actions on others.

Twelve Steps for Parents: How to Make Amends with Children and Family

Successfully approaching and accomplishing step nine requires the alcoholic in recovery to be willing to go to any lengths to make amends to those individuals whom they have harmed in the past. Apologizing is difficult for many people, and taking responsibility for your actions can be painful as it may remind you of the harm you have caused. However, this provides you with hope and inspiration to become and remain a better person in all future endeavors.

Promises to do things differently

• Make a list of everyone you’ve made promises to that you didn’t fulfill, the people you’ve lied to, stolen from, or hurt in any way because of who you used to be, and apologize sincerely.
• The process of making amends is not about us fixing everything—that comes in time and from going to meetings, attending to our recovery and cultivating a relationship to a Higher Power.
• This makes the script a powerful tool for managing things in a structured, thoughtful, and sensitive manner.
• Thankfully we are given some insight in to how to make amends through steps 8 and 9.
• I don’t call him to see how his meeting went this week or what step he’s on.

We cannot control how others respond, whether they will forgive or whether they will hold on to negative feelings or resentments. It’s also important to take great care when making amends to someone who is in active addiction because our primary responsibility is to safeguard our own health and recovery from substance abuse. If making an amends means exposing ourselves to triggering environments, we ought to reconsider and discuss healthy alternatives with a sponsor or addiction counselor. In addiction, our actions and intentions aren’t aligned.

Healing the Body, Mind, and Spirit

Crafting Your Personalized AA Amends Script